That Time I Used A Tragic Suicide To Win Over A Woman

How's that for a clickbait title?

Story time: It was our first date. I was just coming off another outing (with a different woman) where I was basically sexually assaulted in an elevator (a story for another day), so it would be an understatement to say that my expectations were low going in. To make matters worse, this new girl had emailed me the day before we were scheduled to go out to say that she was sick and needed to reschedule. In the online dating world, this is code for, 'I'm going out with someone I like better - you are the backup' or 'This is the last message you'll ever hear - Imabout to go ghost mode on yo ass.'

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